Swim Suits and Body Image.

Swim suit season is upon us again.  And yet again, for the fourth year in a row, my body is dramatically different than last year.  I put on my 'playing at the pool' suit last night for the first time in over a year.  Peanut took one look at me and said "That suit is really nice, but you are a little too fat for that."  At least she broke it to me softly.

Just to get it out in the open, I am not fat.  I am pretty fit actually.  Sure, my stomach isn't rock hard and flat, but even when I was doing half iron mans, it wasn't.  I am just not built like that.  I am built a lot more like Mr. potato head with long skinny arms and legs and a little bit on insulation to keep me warm.  I have a lot more ripples than I have ever had, but gaining 50 pounds in a couple of months will do that to you.  Overall, I feel like I have a really healthy body image.

I tried to break it to her softly after she humiliated me in front of everyone in the dressing room at the gym.  She didn't need to tell people that.  I liked the way I looked.  I did it all without being too hard on her because; honestly, she doesn't really know all the social implications of calling someone fat.  She probably barely knows what it means.   I think she was really trying to tell me that my belly was sticking out.  That I was too tall for my tankini. That doesn't change the fact that I was seething.


Since that conversation, I have been wondering if I say things about body image to her.  I really try not to.  I try not to point out other people or bits about myself.  I worry about young girls and body image.  The body image issues I had as a youngster all focuses on not having any breasts, which is exactly why I will be buying a new swim suit this year.  Ugh, swim suit season.

"I like-a your shoes"

 BabyP has been telling me the last couple of days that he likes my shoes.  Tonight, it was in over load.  Peanut and I both have new running shoes, and I gave him a pair that I had in the closet for him. He was walking around commenting on everyone's shoes while looking at his own.

He told me tonight when I was pulled some left over Orzo out of the fridge, "No No momma.  I do not like yucky pasta."  What?  When did you learn to speak so well?

He continues to grow by leaps and bounds.  We were at the eye doctor today.  I asked him to hand my insurance card to the lady at the desk.  He gave it to her and said "Here, Lady".  He was so proud of himself.  He was nearly busting with excitement and wanted me to give him another card to hand her.  You should have seen his excitement when I handed him the clipboard to give her.  I thought he was going to come unglued.

We were at the eye doctor because he failed his eye exam during his two year checkup.  I, of course, forgot to bring the paper that described the problem.  It didn't take long for the doctor to figure out that he had an astigmatism.  He showed me a bit of what he sees normally uses some special lenses, and it was of great concern to me.  He told me BabyP would likely have glasses, but that he wanted to dilate his eyes first.  After the dilation, he was surprised to find BabyP's sight get better.  He told me we could put off glasses for a few years, but by 6 or 7 he would for sure be wearing them.  I am not happy to hear he has to have glasses, but I am glad that we can put it off for a little while.  I do not want to try to keep glasses on a 2 year old.  Especially a 2 year old who is pretty independent.

Peanut was sick starting on Sunday.  She threw up a couple of times on Sunday, but she just had a fever on Monday.  Her fever was pretty high, but she acted fine all day.  Only after I took her to Kroger after being at home with grandma all day did she complain about not feeling well.  I was surprised she didn't feel worse as high as her temperature was.  I was really worried about her.  She was better Tuesday.  She got better almost as fast as she got sick.

Peanut was great during BabyP's party.  She does a good job standing back and letting him shine.  She was really excited about her new shoes with the hearts and rainbow colors.  I was not so excited to see the size of the heel on them.  They were right on the verge of being sent back.  It is amazing to me how early they put heels on kids shoes.  Peanut plays with a pair of heels at school.  The other day she ran over to me with them on.  I can't beleive my four year has more grace in heels than I do.  Then again, she is much fancier than me.

2 year old birthday party

BabyP had his birthday this past weekend. We had the usual suspects (and some unusual ones) over for bar-b-q, cake, and some swimming.

The birthday boy. He didn't eat the cake as much as he dug around in it to get the worms out.

He didn't so much blow his candles out as much as he spit them out. I made him a dirt cake that had gummy worms in it. He didn't like the cake as much as he liked digging in the cake and getting out the worms.

We had sprinklers on for the kids to run amuck in.

We also had the kids pool, a slide, and a bubble machine. It was FUN!

The best part about having a 2 year old birthday party is that the kids are really into it, but they don't have any expectations of how the party is supposed to go. The party was very kid centered, but it was really for the parents. I hope we are always able to have so much fun with our friends at our kid's parties.

Cute Little things

Peanut was being naughty in the tub the other day. She got out and said "Even when we are wrong, we are friggin' cute."

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It was raining the other day so peanut grabbed an umbrella that was laying around the house. She told her father "This umbrella is only big enough for one human or maybe two small humans like me and my brother."

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I was changing BabyP's diaper. When I started to put his diaper on, he told me, "No momma! I like penis."

Recital

Peanut did her dance to "Be Our Guest" from Beauty and the Beast.  She did much better than last year; however, last year was so much more fun to watch.  She had a great time.  I am so glad.  You can tell she was really trying to pay attention and do a good job.  Bless her heart, she had no idea how that thing ended since she hadn't been in a class for two weeks.  She was a bit lost from the start.

It was a big day for her with lots of running around and GETTING TO PUT ON MAKEUP.  She about came unglued when her "fairy God-mother" was there to watch her dance.  The jumping and talking loud went into overtime.   (And special thanks to Meghan for taking pictures so I could run the video and enjoy the show.) 

She felt so beautiful.  The recital was something she had looked forward to for a while.  We thought we were going to miss it, but luckily, it wasn't the same week we were in New Orleans.

The music was "Be Our Guest", which is in Beauty and the Beast.  The other groups did much more traditional songs and wore tutus.  I thought there might be some worry from Peanut, but she was the "prettiest ballerina out there." 

I was not looking forward to the recital because there was some drama that sourounded it.  Some moms felt it was okay to publically ridicule the teacher for perceived wrongs.  It was really awful.  It become even more shocking when other moms jumped into the fray.  It was amazing to me.  At my office, we don't act that way, and I don't know anyone that really behaves so poorly.  The sad part is, I feel like I have at least 18 years of this ahead of me.  However, it pretty much solidified my notion that we are a much better soccer family than dance family.

I don't really want to tell her that though.  I think she belongs on stage.

Look how happy she is.

and in the end, it isn't about me.

I hate the TV

I think our main TV is really broken.  The plan has always been to replace it sometime when the remodel is done.  But after it broke yesterday, Mr. T. thought we might need to do it at the end of the month.  Then today we had dinner in the quiet.  The kids played with one another.  At the end of the day, I sent Peanut downstairs to watch the Electric Company on Hulu.  I had complete control over her viewing.  I LOVED IT. 

I don't think I want to buy another TV anytime soon.  We will see how it goes, but I think it will be good.  It feels like we have gotten into a bit of a rut with TV.  The kids are always wanting to watch it.  They have even gotten to the point where BabyP knows to hit the side of the TV if it's picture only shows a line.  They turn it on without asking.  I think not having it for a while is going to be a good thing.

or i will go stark raving mad because i will have them under my feet all the time.

2-year appointment

So we had BabyP's 2 year check up today.  He is developmentally right where he should be.  He talks and does all the things that 2 year olds should do.
 
The stats are
W- 26 lbs 12.8 oz or 37%
L - 35.75 or 83% - which i don't really believe.  I think he is taller than that.  I think 2 year olds are next to impossible to measure correctly.  I don't think she is off by any more than 1/2 an inch though.
Head - 19.5 inches or 72%

We talked a little about how babyP doesn't eat crap at dinner.  The doctor gave me a sheet that comes out of a book that I own and go by.  It made me feel 100% better that my pediatrician hands me advice that I am already following.  I always question myself and wonder if I am way out in left field with things.  I just need to be patient with him at dinner and let him do what he wants to do.  I do think that when we get home from school there will be NO SNACKS.  Well, maybe just some crackers in the car. 
On a positive note, he did eat some of the bean soup he was served at dinner.  On a more positive note, Mr. T. made it from the recipe list that I make each week.  It was super tasty.

We also talked a little bit about calcium.  It sounds like both kids will be getting a tums each night with dinner to be sure that they are getting enough calcium.

I was surprised how much baby P talked during the visit.  He doesn't get a lot of talk time with me, so it was nice to for it to just be us.  I might take next Friday off to be with just him for his birthday.

New Orleans

On Mother's day, my mom and I packed up the kids and drove to New Orleans because I had training.  The drive went great.  I was dreading it because, being mother's day and all, I felt that I deserved a bit of time off.  The kids were great and we arrived in New Orleans right at dinner time.  We asked the hotel where some good places to eat where and they pointed us directly to burboun street.

Now, I can only guess that the lady at the hotel did not have kids, and therefore, did not realize that kids do not belong on burboun street.  We didn't have to pass too many strip joints before we made a deter off the street.  We were lucky enough to find us a nice local to ask where to eat.  She pointed us in the right direction.  I bring all that up to say, the first couple of days in New Orleans were like that.  It was not the kind of place one wants to bring their family unless they are in 'the know'.  It really felt like a lot of the places to eat, even in the garden district, were bars.  You have to get off of the main streets to find places with a more family like atmosphere. 

Even with our first couple of days being what they were, I can see why people romantize New Orleans.  It really is it's own little world with a culture that is very distinct.  I think post Katrina, it is even more so.  You don't survive something so devasting and not have a deep fondness for the people and city you live in.  People refer to things as before or after Katrina, which showed me the deep impact that it had on the city.  Many of the people that work for the Corps there had lived in New Orleans most of their lives.  There is also the constant presence of Mardi Gras, from the beads hanging from the trees on St. Charles Street to the float we saw randomly parked on Canal Avenue.

The food alone is an excellent reason to visit New Orleans.  We had beignets in Jackson Square, and Muffalatas on Decatur street.  We ate seafood just about every night.  We had gumbo, red beans and rice, and jumbalaya.  We ate everything, which consequentially left no time for exercising.  Even with small kids, I managed to stay up way too late each night, causeing me to drink too much coffee in the morning. 

The last night we were there, we got all dolled up to go out to eat.  We went to a Spanish seafood resturant in the warehouse district.  On our way back, we saw some police cars.  Being nosy, we walked up the street to see what was going on.  It was there that we saw a band.

The band had not started playing so we stuck around for a couple of minutes to listen as they warmed up.  Then we saw a lady dressed up.  She was handing out beads to people as they exited a gallery.

It took a little bit of coaxing for me to get Peanut to go up and get some beads. She wanted me to go with her, but I wanted to take pictures of her getting them. Beleive it or not, she was a bit shy about it all.

But boy, when she got the beads, she was over the moon. Cameras were made to capture smiles like this.  We didn't really know what was going to happen next, but we did notice that it looked like there was about to be a parade, so we joined in. 

The grown ups, who were European, loved that Peanut and BabyP were there.  They would stop by and give them beads.  Peanut received a bunch of beads and even BabyP, who was strapped to my back got a couple of pairs.  Come to find out we were in a second line.  We finished the evening with a trolly ride.  How is that for the last night in a city that we weren't too fond of at the start?  It made us all kind of sad to leave.

And of course it was all made possible by the kid's adventure coordinator.

Love Letter to a Two Year Old

Dear BabyP,

I am writing this while sitting outside your room.  See, you have taken to not staying in bed which has really cut into my ME time.  It is past 8:30, and you are still awake. I have tried to shut the door on you, but as soon as your hear the click of the door, but you break out into hysterics.  I went into your room a couple minutes later only to be mowed down by your shaking and sweaty little body.  When I pick you up you cling to me like every bit of your life depends on it.  I think you are really scared, but I don't know what of or how to stop it.  I never slept with the door closed when I was a kid.  I remember being in my dorm room and knowing that I had to have the door closed and really really hating it.  Even as an 18 year old ready to defeat the world, I was scared of the dark.  What are you scared of?


You have grown into a sensitive child who is wonderful and caring.  You are sweet and easy going until you don't get your way.  When you make your mind up about something, it is much easier to give in then to try to fight you on it.  My friend said it best when she said you were my sweet bear until you didn't get your way, then you are just bear.  It is funny to see this wonderful and warm kid completely lose it then be happy as a clam 3 seconds later.  At least we don't ever have to worry wondering what is on your mind.

Your talking has taken off by leaps and bounds.  When someone gives you something you say "thanks much".  You are becoming articulate to the point that we can understand what you are saying.  You regularly say 3 and 4 word sentences to get your point across.  I have been surprised by your articulation.  I think you say "koala" better than your sister.  You have gone from being one of the last talkers in your class to someone who talks the best.  One day, when you crawled out of your crib, you turned to your father and said "I sleep here" while pointing to your pillow on your big boy bed.  You regularly tell the ladies at school who is doing what in the classroom.  They say you act like a grown up. 

You parrot your sister often so it is hard to tell if you are expressing what you want, mimicing your sister or trying to please her by asking for what she wants.  Often, when we ask you what you would like to watch, you will tell us "princess".  You often stare at your sister for the social cues.  I think having a sister like yours is perfect for a thoughtful little boy like you.  I think she helps to bring you out of your shell by engaging you with the world around you.

Physically you are as rough and tumble as the rest of the little boys.  You love "trucks", "trains" and "track hoes".  If you don't get what you want, you hit and get mad.  At school, you aren't a hitter or a biter, but you are a hair puller.  At the park, you climb up the arched ladder almost without fail.  You turn back to me and lean out so I can poke your belly before you turn around and hustle up the stairs to slide down the slide.  You always end up going with one leg down the slide with the other strewn out at some weird angle.  You generally correct it, because I always find you at the bottom with a giant smile on your face.  It seems that just as fast as you showed up at the bottom of the slide you are gone again to do another activity.

You seem to be very mechanically inclined.  You like to figure things out, build things with blocks and sand and work puzzles.  You seem to be a very studious child who will tell me "I do it" when I try to help you.   If something is not right and you fix it, you will yell "I fixed it" or "I did it!".  I am not implying that you always have the patience to work things out on your own, but you do at least try before you yell "Momma, Fix It."  "Momma, I broke it!"

You can mostly say your abc's, and you can count to ten.  I don't know where you learned it because at school you haven't been working with numbers too much.  In perfect second child equality, I have worked zero on letters or numbers with you.  Maybe you picked it up in a book or from a toy or something.



People make a big deal about relationships with little boys and their mothers.  I don't think you need more than your sister does, but I do think that you need me different.  You literally need me to be next to you when you are scared or uncomfortable.  At night, when I cuddle you, you look at me with a goofy half smile and stroke my hair.  You make me feel like I exist to make you the best little man you can.  You seem to have such absolute faith in me to make everything from a severe thunderstorm to the ordinary dark at night better with a hug and an encouraging word.  It is an amazing responsibility, but one that comes with lots of rewards including spontaneous kisses from a messy little boy yelling "HUGS."

I love you and your gummy little hugs,
your mum.

Mickey Mouse and Cheerios

babyP crawled into my bed and said "mickey mous and tear-os"  I was sleeping hard and dreaming when I woke up so I didn't understand.  "mickey mous and tear-os"  I asked him to tell me again because I just couldn't get it, but i knew it was a request. 

Mr. T. figured it out Mickey Mouse and Cheerios!  I think someone has a routine that he likes in the morning!

Transitions

We are still working with BabyP on sleeping in his big boy bed.  The transition didn't go so well after the storms.  He starts to go to sleep, but he will startle himself and run out screaming for momma.  I think he really thinks I am going to leave him.  I wonder if it is because I often leave before he gets up in the morning.

Last night he woke up at 4:30 and stayed awake.  I realized I was not going to get him back to sleep around 5, so I just up with him.  I don't know what to do because it seems like everything I do ends up being a GIANT fight.  It has been taking me about a half an hour to wrestle him to sleep at night.  Threatening the crib works a little, but he knows he can get out of the crib.

The thing is, I know that his schedule will be all messed up next week when we are gone again.  sigh... sometime, I will get some sleep.

At the bright side, he is still cuddly and sweet.  No one loves me more than him.  No one wants to be with him more than he does.  I was kissing his face tonight and he closed his eyes, smiled contently and relaxed himself enough to sleep. 

Peanut has been awesome lately.  I have really enjoyed having her around.  She is being really helpful and funny.  I call her my little Sprite because she is always bouncing around with a smile on her face. She is getting ready for recital the Friday after we come back.  She is taking the dancing pretty seriously.  She practices her steps in the kitchen.

We took the training wheels off her bike today.  I only let go for about 5 seconds, but those were a really great five seconds that made everyone proud. 

Vacuum = Scarey

The basement flooded a little last night.  I think the French Drain worked wonders, but I think the water is still getting in another way. 

Anyway, the wet vac was downstairs still plugged in from last night.  Mr. T. was downstairs playing on his computer, and BabyP went downstairs to see what was up.  Things downstairs are a little out of place, so I could hear him playing on the "piano" and rummaging around the kitchen.  Then I hear the vacuum come on and "MOMMA".  I hear the pitter patter of little feet, and BabyP getting up the stairs as fast as he can while yelling "MOMMA" the whole time.  When I pick him up, his little body is quivering, and he is saying "scared."  I started laughing.

Poor bug, he had turned the vacuum on and scared himself silly.  I guess that goes to show how often he hears the vacuum.

Storms and the Parties

It was a stormy weekend.  The days were clear and humid, but the nights were full of thunder, hail, and tornado sirens.  Friday night started our adventure.  I was by myself because Mr. T. was working on one of the project cars.  I had just layed BabyP down for the night when we heard a big clap of thunder and the sirens started going off.  BabyP ran out of his room and proceeded to take his rightful place on my hip for the next 2 hours.  We even spent some time in the storm shelter when I heard that there was a tornado heading towards the heights.  Luckily, no tornado came our way, but just as unlucky, it did end up killing people in other communities.  Mr. T. came home around 10 to the two kids piled on top of me while peanut and I watched the storms on the local news channel.  The alarms started going off again around 11, but the kids, somehow, slept through them.  Ahhh.... Spring in the South.

I don't even have to mention that the next morning was a little rocky because no one got any good sleep.  It was imparative to me that we our morning errands ended at 11 so BabyP could get to sleep by 12 so we could make it to a 3:00 birthday party.  Noah Red turned 2.  His mom, has impecable taste in party favors as we ended up buying the same stuff ON SALE from the same birthday company.  I don't know about Jill, but I have never used that company before.  It is funny because I went back and forth between trucks or trains for BabyP and finally ended up with trucks.  I wish I could have followed Peanut's idea and used a train with a truck in it.  LISTEN UP PAPER PRODUCTS PEOPLE, I HAVE AN OPPUTUNITY FOR YOU!

Saturday night more storms and Sunday another party at the Wonder Place.  I have never been there before, but it was so great.  I need to go there again with both kids.  It is perfect for toddlers. 

Because we had storms both nights, BabyP's schedule is all off.  I thought at first he was putting me on, but I really think the storms scared him so bad he had a hard time falling asleep today and tonight.  If I curled up next to him, he would be fine, but if I left the room, his whole world came crashing down.  I tried putting him in the crib, but that didn't work.  Finally, I stood by the door so he could see me and hear me and eventually was able to move myself outside his door but letting him know I was there.  I don't want to get into the trap of him having to cuddle up with me to fall asleep.  Although most of the time, it would be wonderful, I can see it becoming a problem. 

Peanut continues to be a sprite.  She went with me to get some new bras today.  She had me in stitches while she was assessing the fit.  There was a lady working with us, and when she would leave, Peanut would start on about how the different pieces needed to fit.  She is such a funny girl.  She would point out things she liked or didn't like.  "I think that is too plain."  "I like that one, it is pink and fancy."  "I like the heart on that one." "Oh, this one has a bow, that is really nice."  She makes me laugh because she sounds like she is 16, but she is only 4.  That trip with her could have been a complete disaster, but instead, I am so glad she went.  Her smile and joy is infectious.